Freedom From Attachment

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Beloved Osho,

Mirdad says, "love is the only freedom from attachment. When you love everything you are attached to nothing." And later on: "man made prisoner by the love of a woman and woman made prisoner by the love of a man are equally unfit for freedom's precious crown. But man and woman made as one by love, inseparable, indistinguishable, are verily entitled to the prize."

Would you like to talk about this?

And also about sex and relationships, and if they matter in the spiritual growth? I ask this question, because I have never experienced this except once three years ago, and everybody is even going beyond it. This is what bothers me the most. I don't want to get stuck here. Does experiencing sex deeply make it easier to meditate?

Beloved Osho, I am a bit embarrassed to ask this question, but it wouldn't go away.

Devapria, the BOOK OF MIRDAD is my most loved book. Mirdad is a fictitious figure, but each statement and act of Mirdad is tremendously important. It should not be read as a novel, it should be read as a holy scripture -- perhaps the only holy scripture.

And you can see in this statement just a glimpse of Mirdad's insight, awareness, understanding. He is saying, LOVE IS THE ONLY FREEDOM FROM ATTACHMENT... and you have always heard that love is the only attachment. All the religions agree on that point, that love is the only attachment.

I agree with Mirdad:


In fact one has to understand the very phenomenon of attachment. Why do you cling to something? Because you are afraid you will lose it. Perhaps somebody may steal it. Your fear is that what is available to you today may not be available to you tomorrow.

Who knows about what is going to happen tomorrow? The woman you love or the man you love -- either movement is possible: you may come closer, you may become distant. You may become again strangers or you may become so one with each other that even to say that you are two will not be right; of course there are two bodies but the heart is one, and the song of the heart is one, and the ecstasy surrounds you both like a cloud. You disappear in that ecstasy: you are not you, I am not I. Love becomes so total, love is so great and overwhelming, that you cannot remain yourself; you have to drown yourself and disappear.

In that disappearance who is going to be attached, and with whom? Everything is. When love blossoms in its totality, everything simply is. The fear of tomorrow does not arise; hence there is no question of attachment, clinging, marriage, of any kind of contract, bondage.

What are your marriages except business contracts? "We commit to each other before a magistrate" -- you are insulting love! You are following law, which is the lowest thing in existence and the ugliest. When you bring love to the court you are committing a crime that cannot be forgiven. You make a commitment before a magistrate in a court that "We want to be married and we will remain married. It is our promise, given to the law: we will not separate and we will not deceive each other." Do you think this is not a great insult of love? Are not you putting law above love?

I am a lawless man; that's why two dozen countries are against me, although I have never committed any crime. But I don't believe in any law either.

I love -- there is no need for any law.

Law is for those who do not know how to love.

Law is for the blind, not for those who have eyes. Law is for those who have forgotten the language of the heart and only know the language of the mind.

Mirdad's statement is of such great value that it should be deeply understood -- not only intellectually, not only emotionally, but in your totality. Your whole being should drink it:


... Because when you love you cannot even think of anything else.

WHEN YOU LOVE EVERYTHING YOU ARE ATTACHED TO NOTHING. Each moment comes with new splendor, new glory, new songs; each moment brings new dances to dance. Perhaps partners may change, but love remains.

Attachment is the desire that the partner should never change. For that you have to commit to the court, to the society -- all stupid formalities. And if you go against those formalities you will lose all respect and honor in the eyes of the people amongst whom you have to live.

Love knows nothing of attachment because love knows no possibility of falling from dignity. It is the very honor itself, the very respectability itself; you cannot do anything against it. I am not saying that partners cannot change, but that it does not matter: if partners change but love remains like a river, flowing, then in fact the world will have much more love than it has today.

Today it is just like a tap -- drip, drip, drip. It is not able to quench anybody's thirst. Love needs to be oceanic, not the drip, drip of a public tap. And all marriages are public.

Love is universal. Love does not invite only a few people to celebrate, love invites the stars and the suns and the flowers and the birds; the whole existence is welcome to celebrate.

Love does not need anything else -- a night full of stars, what more can you ask for? Just a few friends... and the whole universe is friendly. I have never come across a tree who was against me. I have been to many mountains, but I have never found any mountain antagonistic. The whole existence is very friendly.

Once your own understanding of love blossoms there is no question of attachment at all. You can go on changing your partners, that does not mean you are deserting anybody. You may come back again to the same partner, there is no question of any prejudice.... And later on Mirdad says:


The moment love becomes attachment, love becomes a relationship... the moment love becomes demanding, it is a prison. It has destroyed the freedom; you cannot fly in the sky, you are encaged.

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