Spiritual Sexiness

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Your heart’s light fills my life. Like all men, I may occasionally look at a pretty woman and spend hours toiling at work, but your heart is the source of the radiance that inspires my entire life and evokes my deepest gifts. Nothing opens my heart more fully than seeing the light of love in your eyes and feeling your body open as love to receive me. Nothing is as beautiful as your heart’s surrender and the radiant offering of your devotion. Your love opens my heart endlessly, even when I would otherwise forget love’s depth.

Whether or not you are with a man, your heart yearns for deeper love. Often—but not always—you yearn for love through the form of a man. Why? And what makes you or a man sexy in a spiritual sense?

Your desire to be claimed by a man’s deep love is based in the truth of your heart: You are love. Your love shines as light, so you want to be seen. Your love shows as the full force of surrender, so you want to be passionately entered. In truth, your deep heart is right now being claimed by openness, ravished by the openness of love.

Your yearning to be taken open is simply the natural feeling of your heart already being taken open, but you have patterns of resistance, and so you feel the tension—the longing—between the openness you deeply know is possible and the openness you are allowing.

Just as your love can open a man’s heart, a deep man can offer you an opportunity to open more deeply.

Without even touching you, a deep man can swoon you open to God—he can open you to love’s divine mystery and blissful benediction—if he is totally present with you, truly seeing you, feeling you, entering you with his loving desire, touching the most vulnerable depth of your heart.

When he looks into your eyes, you can feel him entering your heart. His presence can be so strong, so unwavering and passionate and clear, that his love invades you, deepening into you. Your body and heart open to him, surrendering open to receive his love, wanting him to enter you even deeper.

What you trust about a man is his integrity of being open in love with you and his strength of presence. When his attention wanders—he seems to be listening to you but his eyes are darting all over the room and his thoughts are elsewhere, or he is caught up in his own pursuit of pleasure—then you lose trust in him. In response to his lack of presence and integrity, your body tenses and your heart pulls back to protect itself.

But when his attention is totally with you—you can feel him feeling the rhythm of your breath, touching you just where you long to be caressed, anticipating your needs before you notice them—then you naturally surrender and open to receive him.

You crave his fully present attention, which results from the openness of his awareness, the freedom of his consciousness. Your man is spiritually sexy when his attention is free, when he is not wrapped up in a jangle of thoughts and conflicting desires, when his consciousness is free to be with you totally, undistracted.

Your man is spiritually sexy when you can feel his consciousness in his entire body fully alive and present with your entire body. His belly, legs, and feet are strongly present with you, not just his bulging eyes and genitals; his heart is fully feeling you through his whole body. His entire presence is unconvoluted, honest, and genuinely with you, and his whole body is open, relaxed, and strong with the force of conscious presence.

And what does he find spiritually sexy in you? He is irresistibly drawn into the light of your love, showing through your entire body as radiant openness and devotional surrender. When you fall in love with somebody, you become more radiant, and your friends can see it. Your eyes sparkle, your cheeks glow, your walk changes, becoming softer and more buoyantly alive. Light and life-energy is the way love appears through your body. Love’s radiance, love’s energy, shines and opens through your entire body in a very noticeable way.

The openness of this love-light is what your man finds spiritually sexy in you. The more you open in trust and offer this light through the yearning of your love, the more he wants to enter you and merge with your glorious surrender, his heart of presence melding as one with your heart of love. He wants to dive into your devotional surrender and take you open, more deeply, as your never-ending yearning invites him more deeply in to love’s fullness.

Your capacity to open in oneness with a man’s presence is your spiritual capacity for sexual surrender. Your man can feel whether or not you are surrendering open in yearning invitation for him to merge with your love-light and claim your heart. If you don’t trust a man fully, then, of course, you won’t surrender fully open with him.

Unsurrendered women attract unpresent men. Your lack of heart-surrender and your mistrust will make your man less present and less trustable. You and your man are either evoking in each other openness or closure, worship or distance. The depth of yearning you offer invites the depth of presence you are likely to get.

A man who could be fully present with you—a man whose consciousness was deep and clear because he was living his true purpose and his passionate heart was unencumbered by fear and ambiguity—such a man wants equally unambiguous surrender offered through your yearning body and heart. He wants your love offered as an open invitation with full energy through your entire body. You want his full presence entering your deep heart through his entire body.

Your man wants to see love shining in your face. He wants to feel your yearning rippling through your body, emerging through your moans of passion.

You want your man to truly see you, deeply feel you, and know you, utterly. You long for his claim to open you so deeply that your surrender is inevitable, love-forced beyond your own doing. Your heart and body open as the pleasure of almost unbearable devotional offering, “I am yours, take me.”

You are only willing to surrender open if he is fully present with you, committed to claiming your heart with his absolute integrity of being. And he is only willing to commit his presence with you if you are willing to surrender open and offer your heart’s light and devotion as love’s yearning.

His presence will, in fact, waver, as will your offering of love’s energy. You will sometimes feel unmet, and you will close down. And so you learn the art of breathing love and trusting open, as if surrendering open to sexual ravishment, with or without a man. All day, you can practice offering your heart and body to be claimed by God, settling for nothing less.

Your surrender and your man’s commitment, opening each other more deeply than you would open yourselves, is an art that can be practiced in relationship. With or without a man, you can practice opening your body to flow with pleasure while opening your heart as an offering of love’s yearning.

Dear Lover by David Deida

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